


The Hyun's Family Trip

by 3Stack



Category: B.A.P, EXO (Band), GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Baekhyun'sgrandmas, BreakingDown, Carride, Grandmashouse, IMSORRY, Itcan'tbeclassifiedasanything, M/M, Oneshot, Popcorn, Roadtrip, Thiscan'tevenbeclassifedascrack, caraccident, happiness, it'strash, makesnosense, maybetrash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-26 20:53:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14410356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3Stack/pseuds/3Stack
Summary: The Hyun family is driving to Baekhyun's grandmothers house. It's a story about their adventure there. This will make no sense, because it's just a weird story that me and someone from 3stack made 2 years ago, but I changed the names and added some stuff. Plus it was an audio story at first, so I had to write out the weirdness. Sorry for this piece of trash. Hope you enjoy.





	The Hyun's Family Trip

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Renaitrev](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Renaitrev/gifts), [3Stack](https://archiveofourown.org/users/3Stack/gifts).



 

    The Hyun family was on a trip to Baekhyun’s grandmother's house for a fun get together. Daehyun and the kids decided to go with him. Daehyun the car genius drives the car, while Baekhyun sits in passengers seat, and the two kids sit in the back. It’s late at night and they are driving in the middle of what seems like nowhere. Trees are surrounding them, and they haven’t seen a car in a few miles. They were alone, and were going to have to get a hotel for the night.

 

    Baekhyun hates the silence in the car and turns on the radio. It’s cats and Cradles. Wow, this song is quite the Lit. He turns the volume up. He listens for a few seconds but gets bored and changes the station. OOOOOH, a radio show. “There was once a man. The man was walking over there.” This is on the radio, “And once he reaches his house. He opens the door, and he heard the door screech open.” Baekhyun turns off the creepy story, because his children would not hear such nonsense.

 

   “That was an interesting show,” Taehyung says, “ I want to listen to it again.”

 

   “Yeah,” BamBam says, “Turn in back on.”

 

   Baekhyun hears their complaints and figures the best way to make them hate the show was to turn it back on and scar them for life. So that's what he does. He turns the Radio back on. 

 

Click, “fkalhfiowbsa;kdfhio!!!! IT’s a ghost!”

 

    “AH!”  Taehyung screams covering his ears, “Turn down the volume!!!”

 

Baekhyun turns it off smiling. He hopes they remember this for a long time. He then looks back to see that BamBam isn’t eating his carrots. “BAM! Eat your carrots,” He says in a loving and motherly way.

 

“But I don’t want to eat my carrots!” BamBam wines.

 

“But you have to,” BAekhyun says getting pissed off at his son.

 

“I DONT WANT TO,” Bam bam Screams, while uncapping a bottle of glue. It looked like he was going to dump it all over Taehyung feet…

 

“Don't you dare put glue on your brothers feet!” He warns. 

 

“Oh, but I want to,” Bam Bam complains.

 

“BAmBam!” BAekhyun says loudly.

 

“BamBam fell in the well!” Taehyung says for no reason.

 

“Taehyung!” Bambam says offended by that comment.

 

“BAm Bam!” Taehyung yells back to annoy him.

 

“Taehyung!”

 

“Bam Bam!”

 

“MOther!!!” bam bam says.

 

“MOm!” TAehyung says.

 

“Mother says NO,’ Daehyun says from the drivers seat, “This is dad.”

 

“Turn the radio back on.” Baekhyun says tired of all the useless yelling.

 

Daehyun turns the thing back on and again Cats and the Cradles is playing.

 

Baekhyun seems to hear something the others don’t, “Oh look.”

 

“Turn down the radio,” The annoying little Taehyung says.

 

“A cow version,” Baekhyun says turning the song up. It was a cow version, full of moos.

 

“But  _ I  _ want to hear the cow version,” Bam bam says at Taehyung.  Taehyung sits back sadly and listens to the tunes of horrible cowiness.

 

“MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO.”

 

           ALL OF A SUDDEN a giant clunking noise is heard. It sounds like it's the engine. The car starts to shake and smells like chloroform.

           Daehyun tries to put on the brakes, but they won't work. “ENGINE. DYING!!!” Daehyun yells as he loses control over the wheel and they start to run off the road.

 

“Is that a tree?” Taehyung says pointing in of front of them. It was a tree, a big one.

 

“IT’s a TreE!!!” Daehyun yells as they hit it. BAM!!!!!! THEY HIT IT!!!!!

 

           Baekhyun feels himself hit the dashboard. He lays there for a few seconds. His head pounded. He looks up and sees Daehyun leaving the car. He looks back at the kids and they look fine and awake. He leans back in his chair and looks out the window and sees Daehyun has popped the hood and is figuring out what went wrong. It might take a bit though, because there's a lot of steam and smoke coming from it.

 

“Mommy?” BamBam says. Baekhyun looks back at him, “What's daddy doing in the car engine?”

 

“What was that sweety?” Baekhyun asks rubbing his head. It was still foggy from hitting it.

 

“Why is daddy in the car engine?”

 

“Daddy?” He says out loud trying to comprehend what the child just said, “Daddy ate the car engine? Is that what you said?”

 

“Yes…” BamBam says.

 

“Daddy don't eat car engines. He fix car engine,” Baekhyun says, “With oil. He fix it!” Baekhyun looks back at Daehyun and sees him putting some oil into the engine. Baekhyun could swear he saw Daehyun say “Here's the extra oil, squeak squeak squeak. Oiling the car engine.” It seems like something he would say.

 

“MOmmY!!!” Taehyung screams from the back. Baekhyun quickly turns back to look at him. “I CAN'T FEEL MY TOES!!!!!!!!!”

 

Baekhyun looks down at Taehyung's feet and they're covered in glue. He sighs, “That's because BamBam put glue on it!”

 

           Taehyung starts to cry. If you listened you could hear him saying “...Taehyung...Taehyung…” In a sad tone.

 

Daehyun closes the hood which makes a loud noise that makes Baekhyun turn his head to see that he was done oiling. Daehyun opens the car door and sits back down. “Hi babe,” He says as he puts the keys back into the car and turns it on, “Vroom.” Daehyun loved the sound of a car. “It's working again.”

 

           “Now let's get out car out of the tree,” Baekhyun says smiling at Daehyun.

 

“Oh, right,” Daehyun says. He puts the car in reverse, “Reverse,” He says vrooming out of that tree. It's surprisingly easy to get it out. “Back into drive.” Daehyun says putting it into drive, “Lets go.” He keeps driving till they can merge back into to traffic, which is so easy since they're in the middle of nowhere and there is no traffic. “And we’re back on the road.”

 

           They keep driving in silence until Daehyun sees a sign on the road for a gas station about a mile away. They needed gas.”Soooooo,” Daehyun says, “We’re gonna make a lot stop sooner or later. We have to go to the gas station we’re running low, but don't let that worry you. We're almost there. 

 

“Mommy Mommy,” Taehyung says, but Baekhyun ignores him because he’s tired of this child's shit.

 

           “Mommy Mommy,” Taehyung says again, “Where's my brother?” 

 

           “Your brother should be in his seat?!” Baekhyun says looking to the back to see that bam bam wasn't there. He was getting really pissed off at these kids.

 

“He’s not,” Taehyung says.

 

           “Did you throw him out the window?” Baekhyun asks. He swears to god, if this child threw his brother out again…

  
  


           “.....Yes,” Taehyung answers.

 

           “Oh, okay we gotta pull this thing over,” Daehyun says stopping the car.

 

           “This is the fifth time I’ve told you not to throw your brother out the window!” Baekhyun says sharply at Taehyung.

 

           “Ugh, Taehyung I cannot believe you,” Daehyun says taking off his seat belt and grabbing a flashlight.

 

           “But he put, he put glue on my foot,” Taehyung cries, while Daehyun gets out of the car to go find BamBam.

 

           “No you put glue on his foot do you not remember?” Baekhyun says clearly not remembering that Taehyung was the victim here.

 

           “Mommy!!!” Taehyung cries as Daehyun opens the door to the back. 

 

           Bambam steps into the car and is talking non stop. “Mommy mommy, daddy daddy, Taehyung threw me out the window because I had glue on my foot.” We all know that's a lie, because Taehyung's the one with glue on his foot.

 

           Baekhyun sits back in his seat and looks out the window. “Honey, Did you throw him out the window?!”

 

           “Uhhh…” Taehyung starts, “I'm sorry mommy...I did. I had gum on my feet.” He then starts to cry.

 

           “Which kid is this?” Baekhyun asks. He really is confused.

 

           “Taehyung.”

 

           “Taehyung,” Baekhyun starts, He looks confused, “I thought  _ you  _ were thrown out the window?”

 

           “I threw Bambam out the well,” Taehyung says guilty.

 

           “What well?!?!?!” Baekhyun asks looking back at his son.

 

           “The window well.”

 

           “There ain't no such thing as a window well,” Baekhyun says sitting back onto his seat.

 

           “There is in my world,” Taehyung says confidently and sure of this choice.

 

           “Well your world’s just stupid,” Baekhyun says.

           Taehyung didn't look happy when Baekhyun said that, but he stopped talking.

 

           “I'm putting a bandaid on BamBam’s knee,” Daehyun announces as he pulls the paper off of a peppa pig bandaid. Taehyung looks over at it. He wishes it was his bandaid. He loves peppa pig and her idiot brother. “Slap,” Daehyun says as he smooths the bandaid over the young BamBam's knee.

 

           “I'm feeling better already,” BamBam says putting on his seat belt. Daehyun closes the car door and gets into the drivers.

 

           “What’d ya say dear?” Baekhyun asks. He needs to get his ears checked. He can't hear anything anymore.

 

           Daehyun starts singing, “Get back in your car,” he closes the car door and puts on his seat belt, “Seat belts on.” He then puts the car into drive.

 

           “Daddy,” Taehyung says, “Can I have a popcorn sickle?” 

 

           “Sorry we ran out of popsicle sicles,” Daehyun answers with his eyes glued to the road like the damn good driver he is.

 

           “No,” Taehyung whines, “I want a  _ popcorn _ sicle.”

 

           “I don't have any,” Daehyun says, “We’ll check the gas station.”

 

           “Mommy Daddy,” BamBam says, “Is it like, two seconds to two minutes to two hours of driving we’ve been driving and there's glue?”

 

           “It's been six hours and...two minutes,” Daehyun answers.

 

“Honey, no it's been eight hours and eighteen hours a minutes,” Baekhyun says.

 

“Well, BamBam thought it was two!” Daehyun says defensively. “How the time flies when you're having fun in the car!!!” He says. He and Baekhyun then start to laugh like lunatics on crack.

 

     “Let's sing a Christmas carol,” Taehyung says.

 

“DAshing through the Snow,” Daehyun sings.

 

“And a one horse open sleigh,” BamBam adds.

 

“BElls are...oh,” Taehyung sings then stops cause he forgot da words.

 

“LAughing all the way HA HA HA HA AHA,” Bambam yells.

 

“Bells on bobtail rings,” Daehyun sings.

 

“MAking Spirits bright,” Baekhyun sing then starts laughing again, “HWO hwow HHAHAH.”

 

The others start laughing too. A ha ha ha!!!!!!

 

“Uh aha ha ah, that was good.” Daehyun says, “Lets park over.” He says this because they have just pulled into a gas station.

 

“Look a gas station,” Taehyung says stating the obvious. Daehyun pulls next to a gas pumps and turns off the car.

 

“Yeah, I’ll go get gas,” Daehyun says leaving the car.

 

“Mommy, I think Bambam is peeling off his bandaid,” Taehyung says looking at Baekhyun in pleadingness.

 

“Honey don't peel off your bandaid,” Baekhyun says to BamBam. He doesn't look back at them he just keeps looking forward.

 

“I want to mommy!” BamBam cries.

 

“You CAN'T! Baekhyun says sternly.

 

“But there's gooey green stuff in there…” BamBam says.

 

“That's why you should keep it on darling.” Baekhyun says reaching into his bag.

 

“EWWWW, VEGETABLES!!!!!! Taehyung says. Why he says this isn't a mystery. Baekhyun had just pulled out a drink from his bag.

 

“Just ant juice, dont worry. Very feeling,” Baekhyun says showing off his drink to Taehyung.

 

“What's ant juice?” 

 

“Antihistamine.”

 

“What is that?!?!?!?!”

 

“Uh… Its histamine.”

 

“Mommy, what's daddy doing?” Bambam asks. His hands nowhere near that bandaid. Thank god!

 

“HE’S getting GAS.” Baekhyun says in between his drinking of ant juice.

 

“But what's he doing?” 

 

“He’s putting it in the car.”

 

“But what's he doing now?”

 

“He’s trying to find you a popcorn sicle.”

 

“But they don't have them.”

 

“He said he would check it anyways, darling.”

 

“But they're in the target, I mean no wait, the walmart,” Taehyung adds.

 

“We are not anywhere near a walmart or a target,” Baekhyun says, “So we are just gonna have to wait because we are in the forest!”

 

“Mommy, do you think if we mix a candle with glue with a little bit of glitter, maybe some panda we’d get...Um, a magic crystal ball that’s made of a clock?” Taehyung asks.

 

“What do you think? No! You would just get a sloppy candle of panda fur. NOBODY WANTS PANDA FUR IN THAT THING WOULD DRIVE US CRAZY AND MAKE US BURN!” Baekhyun says. To be honest he's quite surprised by how stupid his children are.

 

“But the panda makes it alive.”

 

“Honey where have you been reading this nonsense?”

 

“Bambam told me that.”

 

“Bambam! what have you been telling your brother!?”

 

“I don't know, I just wanted to talk to the priest,” BamBam says.

 

“Honey, you guys, you guys can’t keep believing these things.”

 

“But I want to mother,” Taehyung whines.

 

“You have to be smart about it.”

 

“I DON'T WANT TO,” BamBam yells.

 

“If you want a crystal ball thing clock, then you have to find the unicorns.” Baekhyun says.

 

“Where's the unicorns mother?” Bambam asks.

 

“The unicorns are in the clouds. That’s why you go on airplane trips.”

 

“OH mommy can we go on a plane?” Taehyung asks.

 

“No we don't have no money,” Baekhyun lies. They were loaded, but no way was he letting his children on a plane or shall I say a metal tube of death.

 

Daehyun opens the car door, “I’m back.”

 

“Honey tell them why-” Baekhyun got cut off.

 

“I can't find you no popsicle!” Daehyun says to the children.

 

“Tell them why they can't go on an aeroplane.”

 

“Because,” Daehyun starts, “if you go on one of those things you’ll DIE!!!!”

 

“They’re giant tubes of death. And that's why we don't go on them. Even if you can see unicorns. It's the price you pay for safety.”

 

    Daehyun starts the car and the get back into the road. Daehyun sees something in the middle of the road.

 

“Oh no, it's a big speed bump.” He says as they fly over it. BU BUMP. When they land there car starts to feel shaky again “OH no what happened to our engine.”

 

“Oh no, did it go out again? I think you need to go put a little more oil in it.” Baekhyun says.

 

“Got it,” Daehyun stops the car and goes back outside to fix the problem.

 

“Mommy, what does oil do?” Taehyung asks.

 

    “UH, Um it...it's a hard thing to explain. Yeah, i'm gonna stop.”

 

Daehyun goes back into the car after fixing it, “Let’s find a hotel a ha ha ah ah ah”

 

“That sounds like a splendid idea,” Baekhyun says his head was pounding now. He couldn't wait to sleep off the pain.

 

“MOMMY I DON'T WANT TOOOOOOO,” Taehyung cries.

 

“Well to bad honey,” Baekhyun snaps.

 

Taehyung cries in the back loudly.

 

“Shut up!” Baekhyun yells at him. 

 

    He does. Now he cries silently.

 

     They find a hotel for the night.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this horrible story. If you want more please comment, because another wise I probably won't do anything with this. They might make it to the grandmas house. I don't know. Anyways, I gifted this to myself and renaitrev, because she never reads any of my works and she needs to. I keep sending them to her, but she won't read them. It's annoying, like, be a better friend and sister. Oh well, thanks for reading.


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